I often skim the obituaries. Nearly everyone who dies from cancer is reported as dying after an "X-years-long battle with cancer." Recently I said to my spouse, when I die, please don't say that I died after a battle with cancer. She said, "OK, how about after a dance with cancer?" Much better.
I just don't like the idea of battling with something that is a part of my body. I am perfectly happy to share my body with some cancer cells, as long as they don't get in my way. To me, that's a dance not a battle.
I'm afraid of cancer - the challenge that it poses to my other cells to hold their ground and maintain a balanced environment of healthy growth within my body. But I'm not at war with it. Yes, there are sanctions that come in the form of targeted therapies that are designed to keep cancer cells in their place. But we're living together.
Maybe a good analogy is parts of my personality that I'm not particularly in love with - for example, my inability to lose an argument or a board game gracefully. When it happens, I have two choices: I can berate myself, hate that part of myself that is so ridiculously fragile, or I can laugh at myself and resume my determination not to act like such an idiot the next time I lose.
So let the dance continue.
Talk about a radical reorientation (!) If you can dance with cancer, maybe I can dance with the parts of myself (or my circumstances) that are most challenging - probably none nearly as challenging as cancer, but still...
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